Diets are for Pansies

My age and my birth control have finally caught up with me. As I prepared to shower I noticed something out of place... A lone faint stretch mark marring my freckle stained alabaster flesh. Now I have to make a decision. Do I give up and buy larger clothes, submitting to the common American affliction? Nay! I have far too much pride for that. I think.

As a 5'3 caucasioid weighing in at 135, I don't look overweight. In fact, when I grouch to coworkers they look at me like I'm crazy when I say I want to lose 20 pounds. My family and Bubby however see me more clearly. At 16 I weighed 110. At 20 I weighed 115. The quick and steady weight gain is the abysmal repercussion of a sedentary work life (every other job I've had has kept me on my feet or on the go) and a distaste for sweating. They say during college you put on 15 pounds, but I was the exception to that. I stayed steadily slim until this demon of a lifestyle set it's gaping maw on my vitality and spunk.

Given my circumstances I don't really know how I missed it. As a former amateur model and actress I've always been very aware of my figure and how my body reacts to my lifestyle. Perhaps it is a twist of fate that I haven't done any acting since college and my weight has sky rocketed. An after work improv group plus some buckling down on working out every day may be the key to my success. But how to find an improv group who would accept me into their wacky embrace in a town I don't know? Assistance would not be dismissed *wink*.

Until tomorrow, random person who accidentally came across my blog and read the first two sentences!

Assi Plaza - The Proving Ground

After much deliberation I found myself needing to go to the only Asian food/etc shop within 45 minutes: The Assi Plaza. This place is one of the most amazing and terrifying places ever for a super Anglo looking girl such as myself. Add my hulking blond, blue eyed Bubby and we got some seriously odd looks. I believe one woman actually sniffed me...

Nevertheless, I found everything I was looking for and about $20 more on top of that. A super efficient bento box for him and a cuter version for me. So many more things would have been picked up if it hadn't been for grouchy mc concussion, but I couldn't force the poor guy around the gigantic store any longer. I ended up with lots of seasonings, some premade Furiaki (though i'll be attempting my own later) and seaweed/veggies galore. I'm a little sad I had to work out when I got home but i'll be up early tomorrow to make my lunch.

I've made it a mission statement "less chips, more carrots!"

Ramen Eggs, the Adventure

I've been seeing mentions of delightfully delicious ways of using my beloved (but over indulged in during college) Ramen seasonings. Don't get me wrong, I also recognize that they might not be great for me, but isn't sitting in a non-ergonomic chair with a busted height adjustment bad for me too? And I say nothing about that!



Work rant behind me, I begin. My first goal. Soft boil eggs.



This may not turn out well, as I have never successfully hard or soft boiled an egg (you shut up, you judgy judger). So I'm going to detail it and you can leave a note telling me how to not screw it up next time *wink*.



Step one: Pot halfway filled with cold water. Science class said cold water boils faster, so... yeah.



Set at hottest setting so water boils fast. Remembered that lids make things boil faster. Add lid. Stare until bored, walk away, then have to run in when put boils over.



Kitchen= 1 Charlotte= 0



Fill excessively large Tupperware with cold water and ice cubes (I saw that one time... that's right... right?)



Check that pot is at "rapid simmer" (I appreciate the attempt, Mom, but that helps if you know the difference between a simmer and a boil... thanks, youtube.)



Attempt to "gently lower the egg into the (freaking) boiling hot water". Burn finger nips and nearly crack egg (lucky save!). I shall use the tongs. Victory goes to the monkey with the tool.



Blog while waiting the seemingly endless 6(?) minutes til soft boil sets in. Realize ice melts... add more ice. Three minutes... Ponder life, pet cats, stare at suspiciously cloudy glass of water that has been on the counter for too long. Realize it was an avacado experiment that was altered by inquisitive (i.e. mischievous) cats. Start searching for avocado seed.... crap! the eggs!



Eggs seem ok. Placed them (using the tongs again) into the ice water. Noticed the egg I dropped is cracked, but no egg escaped. Win!



Kitchen= 1 Charlotte= 1



Wait until eggs are cooled... again with the dang waiting! Boil water in the interim preparing the Ramen soup (no noodles, just packets per various recipes). Wow!! The first time in my life I've ever peeled an egg so beautifully!



Add peeled eggs to boiling water + Ramen packets for about 6 minutes with lid on off the burner. Remove lid. Wait. Blog. Watch TV. Wait. Nap.



Well, the eggs are submerged in their Ramen soup and in the fridge (tightly closed, I know, I know). Bed time for me, but tomorrow night will be rice night... yet another I've yet to get right!

Bento, Baby

The interwebs are a dangerous place for people who love to eat but can't cook. So many pretty dishes with comments like "so easy!" and "if I can do it, anyone can!". It's wrong to get a girl's hopes up.

My kitchen disasters are fairly typical: burnt meat, raw meat, goopy gluey macaroni, many many fire alarms and the one time I'm pretty sure I gave myself salmonella. I'm sure everyone has done that at least once. Of course they have. *cough*

I've been "taught" by Bubby (the boyfriend's allocated name which he would murder me if he saw) to use the meat thermometer and told the many cooking temperatures one should aim for but not exceed. I've also been informed (post sutures) how to properly use a big knife. Watching the food network WAY more than any one person should have to has given me an appreciation for a pretty plate, so when I saw all the adorable cutting utensils online I had to figure out a way to need them.

Since Bubby is a diabetic and I need to lose about 15 pounds, I've been looking into low carb options for lunch. The hours at work are my bad times. Either I snack all day on things I shouldn't and eat a not so great for me lunch, or I wait until 1:30 without eating much bfast and am starving and graze all night when I get home. I basically sit right next to the refrigerator (which is fairly typical: stinky and full of other people's leftovers) so I have ample opportunity to put fresh snacks in... If I ever remember to buy/prepare them.

Then I saw it. The pinnacle of cute utensils. The reason to surround myself with crafts... and be able to eat them! The chance to make Bubby open his lunch box and blush as his co-workers hoot and hollar with gleeful pointing! Oh, um... I mean... The chance to show off my crafty prowess and keep the diabetes and pounds at bay!

Bento Boxes.

Adorable cookie cutters, egg shapers, pretty boxes to place my perfectly prepared (ok, burnt or undercooked) lunches into. As a gal with a lot of allergies, not all the recipes I find are acceptable; as the girlfriend of a diabetic, I have to make sure he's not sneaking twinkies or scarfing down a bag of tortilla chips (Yes. I saw the bag you hid under the banana peel, I'm no dummy).

For the next however long my attention stays on this time I shall be attempting to remember to post a (not) snarky rendition of my pursuit of life, love and hopefully not too insultingly anglicized bento.

Broken Promises

Hello from the techno grave!

I haven't been blogging much... nor writing (aside from the required pseudo friendly work emails "oh, you need the tps reports? sure!"). All in all I feel as though my brain has shut down when it comes to writing the way I once did.

It shall all change now. *puff of smoke*

Aww man... naught has changed, has it? No worries, at least I have you! Wait... where are you going? No! Don't go! I promise to use less ellipses!!!!!

But I'll break that promise, no doubt.